Been Marginalized?

So you’ve been marginalized and are confused and hurt, because your family or circle of friends has excluded you from the loop. Unless you are an out and out ogre, or never shower, attempting to discover the reason is self defeating. If you are downgraded to a fringe membership in the group, maybe it’s time to shake things up a bit.

Sociologist will disagree, but I believe this situation has many benefits. It presents an opportunity to create your own unique niche.

Suddenly you are liberated. You no longer are required to endure the company of those who do not value you. For the holidays instead of being miserable and feeling like a schlub, take trips to places you want to go.

Get caller ID and use it. Better yet, get an unlisted phone number. You will find yourself included when people require assistance for crap you don’t want to do.

When an occasion arises that requires a gift, however diminished your position, you will receive an invitation. Ignore it. Spend the money on yourself. Buy more shoes.

Do what you want to do. Get that tattoo; pierce a body part. Wear caftans with cowboy boots. Give up wearing underwear.

Make new friends. Chat up the unusual looking person, with the magenta and green hair standing by the fennel at the organic supermarket. You could discover a whole new group of interesting people. You may decide you want to BE that person with the magenta and green hair.

Host a dinner for people who have nothing in common. It has the potential to be a lively evening and the beginning of new friendships. If it proves to be a dud, mark it off your bucket list.

Eventually those who excluded you will realize your “give a damn is busted” and you may find yourself on their “in” list again. Proceed slowly and remember Maya Angelou’s suggestion, “When people show you who they are, believe them the first time”.

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