In spite of comments from others, I described my weird habits as eccentricities until someone commented that an eccentricity requires a level of savior faire that I have yet to acquire.
Whether they are eccentricities or weird; I find it much simpler to acknowledge my oddities and bypass the shrink.
I get uneasy if there is unequal and dim lighting in a room. I require a minimum of three lamps in every room. At the first hint of dusk, lamps must be on, mid-level lighting on all three lamps. Improper lighting is as irritating as nails on a chalkboard. The lamps must have some degree of relationship to the décor and each other, but cannot match; can’t stand lamp “sets”.
I am not a health nut who eats certain foods together for improved digestion, however I eat one category of food at a time i.e. meat, vegetables, potatoes. I was not aware of my eccentricity until someone pointed it out in a restaurant loud enough for the valet parking attendant to hear. I’d like to believe it lends an aura of mystique to my persona, but was informed “odd” is not mysterious.
Unorganized shelves anywhere make me nuts. Glassware enjoys residing by similar receptacles as do plates, cups and saucers. Spices would never feel comfortable sharing space with canned goods. It’s probably best I not mention the requirements for the bookcase.
My desk lamp has to be slightly higher than the computer monitor that sits slightly to the left, tchotchkes and extra pens on the right.
I have label maker issues. I get antsy when the tape begins to run out. I cannot be certain, but I believe I overheard someone mutter something about the #$%& label maker and dumpster.
One final minor oddity is I must have bedside reading material. I may not stay awake long enough to read more than one page, but got to have that page.
I believe this strangeness may be due to the fact that my second toe is longer than my great toe. I’m turning a deaf ear to suggestion’s that I change the tin foil in my hat.
Categories: Biased, Unbalanced and Politically Incorrect
I am a lifelong Southerner, short story author, and essayist. Home is Dallas, Texas.
My essays have appeared in Flash Fiction Magazine, The Dead Mule School of Southern Writing.