Mary Margaret is the guest blogger this week
The so-called bathroom bills are nothing but veiled attempts to malign a segment of the population.
There is no evidence the transgender population poses a threat to women and children. Self-serving politicians who try to pass mean spirited legislation are another matter.
Why just last week a man showed up in the women’s shower at the gym. It all began when someone heard a male voice whimper from one of the shower stalls, “Am I in the women’s locker room?”
Billie Sue, who is meaner than a snake hollered back, “Can’t you read? Of course, you are in the women’s locker room.”
Lillie Mae, in the adjacent shower, asked if he had his swim trunks in the shower with him. That’s when it got interesting. The man responded he did not have swim trunks; only a small towel. Lillie Mae dislocated her hip trying to scramble for a better view. She’s always been man crazy.
Thelma Jean swaggered closer to his stall in her usual threatening stance and snarled, “You mean to tell me you swam buck naked or did you throw away your swim suit on the way to the women’s locker room?”
It became clear that the man’s attempt for a stealth peek at women backfired and he was trapped.
Lucy who owns the Kut and Kurl Beauty Shop, hollered, “Do not let that man out of the stall until I’m dressed. My reputation will be ruined if it gets out I was trapped in the gym locker room with a naked man.”
Thelma Jean snarled back, “It wouldn’t be the first time you got caught in a room with a strange, naked man.”
By now, the man in the shower realized he was not fooling with helpless females. He began to consider the merits of staying in the stall until the gym closed and a janitor could rescue him.
Molly, who is the soul of kindness, assured the man he had nothing to fear. She said, “I’ll count to three and you can come out and run into the men’s locker room. We won’t look.”
Well, If Molly thought a bunch of hell raising women were going to pass up checking out a naked man holed up in our locker room, she was nuts. I was sure as hell going to look.
As the man exited the shower stall with small towel strategically placed, a hastily formed line required that he run the gauntlet from the women’s locker room to the lobby entrance of the men’s locker room.
Sue Ellen said. “I don’t know what the entire flap was about. The UPS guy has a cuter butt.”
I think women can handle just about anything without help from the government.
Categories: Biased, Unbalanced and Politically Incorrect
I am a lifelong Southerner, short story author, and essayist. Home is Dallas, Texas.
My essays have appeared in Flash Fiction Magazine, The Dead Mule School of Southern Writing.