I Am a Hugger

Poor Joe Biden’s dilemma has me wondering; what’s an innocent hugger to do? A hug or a pat on the shoulder is not in the same category as groping, grabbing and unwanted kissing, or are they?

Are we to abstain from spontaneity when we feel affection for another person?

Last week I crossed paths with my gastro doc. We both stopped to chat, and I hugged him. I think it was mutual, he didn’t shriek or withdraw. He is a jokester and if you gotta have a colonoscopy may as well have it with someone who’s fun. After a colonoscopy a hug is no big deal. However, Biden’s issue caused me to wonder if I made my doc uncomfortable.

I am a hugger, however, to be clear, I am picky about who I hug. For instance, I wouldn’t touch Dan Patrick with a ten-foot barge pole. I’d kiss a spider before I’d hug Ted Cruz. As for DJT, nuh-uh never, even if you paid me.

On the other hand, I do not like it when someone invades my personal space. Do the recipients of my hug feel that I am not being respectful of theirs?  

Men don’t complain about hugging and as for touching; that’s something most women don’t do.

As an uncompromising feminist, I am conflicted about the issue of coming forward years after the fact to complain. It isn’t hard to step away from an unwanted hug. I would think most women, even the most reticent, would have no problem giving a go-to-hell scowl to an unwanted smooch on the top of their head.

Women need to focus our outrage on rape, sexual assault, and gender inequality. Grandstanding about a decades-old hug reinforces negative female stereotypes.

As for me, those that I hug know my gesture is one of genuine affection. Unless I receive negative vibes or someone runs the other way, I’ll continue to hug.


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