My human is slow to discover all my talents. I find her laptop’s warmth irresistible and it is my home base. When she is not looking, I read her emails, check out social media and surf the net.
My recent visit to the web proved so alarming that I may require a generous portion of catnip before I go online again.
It all started when I stumbled across a video of this great orange creature. Had it not been for its horrible orange hue I would have sworn it was my long-lost uncle Cheshire. I wondered what had turned his pink and purple fur into this ghastly shade of indescribable horror. You can imagine my relief when I discovered Cheshire is alive and well.
The creature’s mane was arranged in such a manner that I thought perhaps it’s ruff had become dislocated. My, oh my, that would be a horrible situation for a feline to recover from. I was relieved to discover that my hero, Garfield, had not contracted some horrible malady.
One cannot escape DNA and curiosity drove me to see what else I could discover about this unusual specimen. It appears that the creature is quite vocal, and I thought perhaps it might be the
bastard undesirable runt offspring of a Siamese litter. I quickly ruled that out as the mutterings were not up to the intellect or standards of that breed.
The poor creature tried to cover its unfortunate mane with a red object that had letters on it. The creature evidently has discovered quite a following of humans with the same disability. They stood behind the creature, in a show of solidarity, wearing the same red object.
This creature demands further investigation, but I will have to be careful. I noticed the other day when it appeared on television, my human swore and changed the channel.